When I first considered leaving my position as a pulpit Rabbi in the US in order to fulfill my lifelong aspiration of moving to Israel, I consulted with a rabbi that I respected already living in Israel. His opinion was clear. “Don’t come,” he said.
He then went on to explain that living outside of Israel I was doing many great things, impacting a lot of people, and contributing to the Jewish community and to humanity in a way that I could not while living in Israel. “Here, rabbis are a dime a dozen and you will be a nobody like everyone else.” Well, I went anyway. Sometimes you just have to do what you know to be right. After 2,000 years of exile, the Jewish people have come home. I wanted to one day be able to look into the eyes of my grandchildren and tell them that I was a part of that.
About 15 years earlier another rabbi and his wife made a similar decision. Seth and Sherri Mandell left their home in Maryland and brought their family to live in the Judean Hills. They were living their dream until a few years later tragedy struck. In May of 2001, their 13-year-old son Koby and his friend Yosef, were viciously and cruelly murdered by Arabs not far from their home. Koby and Yosef had cut school that day in order to spend time in nature, exploring the valley adjacent to their town. Their bodies were found the next day in a cave. They had been so badly mutilated that dental records were required to identify the boys.
A few months later I experienced a tragedy of my own. On September 23rd of 2001, just 12 days after 9/11, I was expecting to become a father for the first time. Instead my son returned his soul to heaven before he even took one breath. It was a pain unlike anything I had ever known. My wife and I had expected to spend that night awake listening to the cries of our baby. Instead, we were kept awake by our own cries. The only thing that gave us comfort that night was by thinking of a way to create some light out of the darkness that we were experiencing. We resolved to raise money in the name of our child in order to bring goodness into the world. And that is exactly what we did.
Seth and Sherri Mandell did the same. After their son’s light was so abruptly extinguished, they resolved to return that light tenfold. Just weeks before Koby was murdered, there had been a different fatal terror attack. Koby had said “I feel sorry for the person who was killed, but I feel sorrier for the people left behind.” So after Koby was killed, the Mandell family founded The Koby Mandell Foundation which is committed to healing the broken hearts of those left behind. They provide healing retreats for mothers and therapeutic summer camps for children who have lost family members to terror. They now plan to expand their services to victims of all kinds of tragedy. These individuals who could otherwise be destroyed by grief are able to come out stronger and healthier. By helping these individuals heal, they are shaping and healing all of Israeli society. Their work is miraculous.
There are two wars being fought against terror. One is on the physical plane. The other on a spiritual plane. The Mandells fight the war on terror every single day with the ultimate weapon; love. All of us, Jews and Christians, have the opportunity to join the struggle everyday in every way. In the name of all of those who have lost their lives around the globe to terror and hatred, we must add love and bring healing to the world. We must increase our acts of kindness. We must add an element of goodness to the world that was not there before. This is how we turn darkness into light. This is how we fight God’s war. It is so easy for the families of the victims of terror to let their feelings of hatred towards the perpetrators take root and transform their entire life. If not addressed, it can cast a very dark shadow literally for the rest of their lives and for a child that is something that we cannot allow. A child whose sibling or parent was murdered experiences our healing camps and is transformed. To spend time with other children who have had similar experiences allows the children to open up and to rebuild their lives. Quick story: A child who had lost a father to terror told his counselor that this was the first time that he had smiled in a year. He was so concerned about his mother’s grieving that he was afraid to smile and to ever look happy for fear that it would upset her. We gave that child his smile back and brought a glimmer of hope to what was a hopeless situation. There are countless similar stories.
When I arrived in Israel one year ago I began the process of figuring out what a rabbi turned ‘nobody’ like me was going to do. I was starting over. It was as if the reset button was pushed on my life and I needed to find a new direction. After months of soul searching, I decided that I was going to work for an organization that spoke to my heart and to my soul. It just so happens that The Koby Mandell Foundation is run out of Efrat, the town in the Judean Hills that I now live in. After meeting with the Mandell’s and the executive director of the foundation I felt that I had found the place that I now belong. I had found a way to contribute. So here I am, impacting the world in a much quieter way, yet I hope, in a much greater way.
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